To the hospital or not?

Here I am releasing my frustration again.. I thought I was on the road to good health and yet another setback. I had been feeling really great until about last week when I slowly started to feel fatigued. Then Saturday came around and my medication did not last me as long as usual. I still outputted as much as I normally do, but required 1/2 a pill extra. A total of 2 pills in a 24 hour period. Sunday I became very emotional and not feeling that great, but able to function. Here is where it starts....

Monday- Woke up in the middle of the night with a massive leg cramp (not sure if it is related), and then I started to panic a little that my potassium was low and thus I was having a heart attack! Then off to my counseling appt. I felt nauseated all morning in spurts and like an elephant was standing on my chest. I was a little short of breath and not knowing if it is anxiety or again.. a heart attack? My husband tried to call me down. In my counseling appt. my anxiety definitely rose and I think I was having a panic attack? My counselor helped me take deep breaths, but I was unable to focus much or talk.

I called my GP who has given me his cell phone number and he graciously wrote orders for a STAT Comprehensive Metabolic Panel and CBC. At the lab, I said, "when will I get these results?" They said it would take about 3-4 hours and that I should call my doctor before 5:00 if I had not heard back and that if my labs are way out of range, they will call him. So when I did not get a call (after a message left on the cell phone) I assumed everything was alright. I was still nauseous and then got a massive headache. I decide it must be a virus.

Today- I woke up this morning feeling better, but still no appetite. That is weird for me and a sign something is not right. I can eat almost anytime, hungry or not. My GP called me at 9:30 a.m. to say that my sodium indeed is very low (122, normal range is 142 -145) and that I need to contact one of my endocrinologist to help me with a plan to raise it slowly. He said he was never contacted by the lab until this morning.... I guess I can't trust the lab at Hanford Community either.

I contacted my endo in Fresno. Her office is full of lets say "not very educated people". I don't believe she even has an LVN that works with her. When I told the receptionist that I needed to talk to the doctor that my sodium is low and that I have D-i-a-b-e-t-e-s I-n-s-i-p-i-d-u-s. She said, "your blood sugar is what?" I said, "no my sodium, it is water diabetes". She said, "how do you spell sodium?" Then she said she would leave a note for the doctor on her desk.

Meanwhile I contacted doctor Blevins at UCSF and got two voice mail messages. I then decided to e-mail him as I believe he carries it with him. He called me back within 5 minutes. He explained to me the reason I feel better is I am getting use to it, but this is not necessarily good. He suggested I show up at my endo's office and tell her he sent me and have her do a STAT sodium and depending on the results she may want to admit me to the hospital to have it raised slowly.

I called my Fresno Endo and talked to someone else and told them I would be coming in to be seen today. She said she could get me in later this week. "No lady, you don't understand I need immediate attention and a doctor who knows what they are doing". Ok, I said it much more politely. She said she would talk to the doctor. I asked to be contacted by the doctor. Then I get a call back from her assistant who said, "she will see you at 4:00 today". Not acceptable to me.

I wrote Dr. Blevins and said, I am planning to drive to San Francisco as I cannot trust the care here and explained the response from my Fresno Endo. He wrote me back and said he was swamped (today is clinic day) and that I should call my GP and get a STAT sodium right now. So I did. He walked over to the Kerr Center and wrote the orders for me and they said the results should be back in about an hour. That was 12:30 and it is 2:00 right now. So, it is a waiting game to see what the plan will be.

I am more than frustrated about the fact that I cannot get an acceptable response from my Endo in Fresno. Truly if her office is not set up for a patient like me, then I need to be informed and move on to someone who is. Here is the other frustration.

There are two reason for my sodium dropping. One is too much water intake and the other is too much medication. Last time it was the medication. This time I cannot figure out what it is. I never take 1/2 a pill unless I have outputted 800 ml. I never drink more than 2400 ml in a day? Apparently I have about a gallon of water I need to release. This would explain the reason my pants are so tight!

I am terrified of hospitals after my last horrible experience at Hanford Community. I have to have a doctor who knows how to safely raise my sodium. The endo in Hanford who gave the orders last time did not. My pulse rate goes up thinking about being admitted anywhere other than SF.

The other weird part is that the funny feeling in my head that makes me unable to exercise or lift my kids has not been present in the past few days. Of course I have not really done much but lay around, so who knows.

My pity party. Andrew had yesterday and today off and I scheduled myself off from work this Tuesday to have some quality time with him and yet again, I am saying, "sorry Andrew mommy needs to talk to the doctor", or "lets watch TV". He is now off at his cousin Miles house playing and I am sure having fun, but I am sad.

I pray for wisdom for my doctors. I pray that God can work through whomever is in charge of my care and beyond that I feel I have done all I can do. I just wait now for a call from my GP to see what my sodium is today and I guess show up at my endo's office at 4:00?